Jeffery Bow 0:02
Have you ever felt uncomfortable making a decision or choice that differed from the mainstream? Stay tuned for this episode, The Variant, making choices that differ from societal norm?
Aloha, and welcome to Create Your Life, Your Way. My name is Jeff bow and I'm here to serve you as a Healer, Master Certified Life Coach and Kahu. I will be sharing insights, tips and suggestions to support you on your healing journey. In essence, it's helping to bring you to a place of happiness, authenticity and truth. What do you say? Let's get started.
Welcome to this episode, The Variant - Making Choices that Differ from Societal Norm. Create Your Life Your Way was created to support you in creating a life that you design. When you consciously create, you're not led by your circumstances. I describe the variant for this podcast as one who creates a life that they design based on what they believe is their truth. No one can define that for you, but you. Now is an opportunity to reevaluate your priorities, passion, and dreams.
As children, we are led to believe that the path was high school, then college, get a degree, a job, get married, buy a home, and then everything else falls into place. You work for retirement, and that was the time you could enjoy life. However, many people never make it to that point.
In the US, as of 2020, approximately 50% of all first time marriages end up in a divorce or separation. 60% of all second marriages and 73% of all third marriages end in divorce or separation. How depressing, right? We do all the things we are led to believe is right, and many end up in a place of unhappiness, loss and searching.
When I was growing up, and if people asked what you wanted to do when you grew up, and you mentioned being a musician or artist, you were quickly shut down. They said that if you were an artist or musician you would starve. That saying a starving artist and starving musician was born from this.
This mentality with the norm that was born out of depression. Parents wanted better for their children and that was totally understandable. However, as times changed, the mentality has not. It is where many find comfort in following the societal norm.
In 2020, there were about 31% of college graduates that were unemployed. Let's say that was an off year because of COVID. In 2019, the unemployment rate of college graduates was 22%. You may be thinking that I'm against college and marriage, not at all. I'm trying to show that there is something not working in the template that was prescribed to us growing up. I'm probably a lot older than most of you listening. So the norm that I grew up with may not match what you are going through. However, the current statistics Do not lie. Something is still out of alignment.
We were led to believe that there was happiness and a pot of gold at the end of that spelled out rainbow. For many it never materialized. There is a show called What Would You Do? hosted by John Quinoes. They had an episode where someone would walk into the elevator and everyone inside the elevator, all actors, would be facing the wall in the opposite direction. The person entering the elevator felt so uncomfortable that he turned around and joined them.
The same thing happened on an episode when they had a room being filled with fake smoke. The new person enters the room and notices the smoke as it slowly starts to increase. The person didn't want to stand out. So they didn't say anything. They thought it was okay since no one else who are all actors was saying anything. The actors pretended it didn't exist. They wanted to fit in. This was not scientific experiments, but just fun ones that showed that people want to fit in and not be the variant or lone sheep, as some would say.
Imagine if Rosa Parks gave a up her seat and didn't refuse to move? Imagine if Martin Luther King didn't lead the civil rights movement? What if Michael Jackson, Elvis Presley or the Beatles never created the music that they did? The album Thriller was one of the best selling albums of all times. They all stood out in their own unique ways.
What would have happened if you follow through on something that you wanted to do, believed in, or a choice that you wanted to make but didn't because of the opinions of others, your upbringing or society's influence?
Gary Vaynerchuk or Gary V as he is called as one of the most successful entrepreneurs. He took his father's wine business from 3 to 60 million with the first wine online business. People thought he was nuts, and that it wouldn't work. He is known as one of the greatest minds for culture, relevance, and online internet platforms now. He believes that happiness is the key, not money. Happiness is success. He goes against spending the money for college if that is not what you want to do, but are doing it to please other people and accumulating debt at the same time. He says, if you are miserable, making six figures a year and can be happy, making less, make less. He definitely has blazed the trend that resonates with many entrepreneurs and individuals.
Touting happiness is not a new thing. It has been around for a while. Many people so called sacrificed for their kids their relationship or thought this was how life is. Life is what we create it to be. Yes, there are things that happen in life that are not so good sometimes. It's not the event that defines us, but rather our reaction to the event or circumstance.
Think about this. The hippies in the 60s and 70s made choices that varied from mainstream life. They were criticized for their natural movement, recycling, peace, flower power, solar powered energy, organic farming, the love, not war, belief, and free love. Look at how many of those things just mentioned are mainstream today. Imagine the progress that could have been made in the last five decades if more people had taken on the philosophy back then. How much destruction to the earth and to ourselves could have been prevented.
This is not about whether you support the hippie movement or not. It's just an example of being a variant in your choices. This is about following what is meaningful and important in your life, regardless of the opinion of others, society, family or friends. As long as you're not hurting yourself or others, including the planet, isn't it time to recapture your innate magnificence.
Here is a great example of someone's variant impact in the news recently. Nike changes maternity policy for sponsored athletes because of Allyson Felix, Felix and the 11 time Olympic medalist, had accused Nike of being unsupportive of pregnant women and new mothers. In 2017, when her contract expired, Nike offered a 70% pay cut and did not support her maternity request. She eventually left Nike and signed with a woman focus company Athleta and also started her shoe and lifestyle brand, Saysh. Not sure if I pronounced that properly. It is spelled S-A-Y-S-H. It represents hope, acceptance and the power to create change. Don't you love that?
Most athletes might have been intimidated because of the power behind the Nike brand. Allison knew her worth and stood by it. In fact, other women came forward after this story unfolded. Allyson Felix stood for what she believed to be true for her and didn't just accept what Nike proposed. She knew the inherited risks that came along with her decision. Allyson has been a prominent voice against gender inequality in sports.
Do you have a template that stuck in your mind that prevents you from living your best life?
I would like to make it clear. I am not saying to quit your job, get a divorce or make any drastic changes. This podcast is made to be a catalyst for change. To realize that your choices may differ from societal norm and that's okay. An invitation for you to look at how you can Create Your Life, Your Way. To live in harmony with your source of Divine Presence, the environment and people around you. To feel like you're making a positive difference in this world.
I leave you with this inquiry question. What would you like to change?
Thank you for joining me on this episode, The Variant, Making Choices that Differ from Societal Norm. I appreciate you taking the time to listen to this podcast. Please share it with anyone that you think of that can benefit from this information. It would be an honor, if you took the time to visit Soulpono.com. For more information about me and my services, that's S-O-U-L-P-O-N-O.com. There is a complimentary life balance wheel that you can sign up for if you choose. A Hui Hou, Malama Pono. Until we meet again, take good care.